Mary

I don't usually blog about family drama since that makes our private issues very public but for some reason I just keep feeling like I need to do this. It seems that we are losing Mary and I'm not sure when/if we'll see her again so I wanted to write her a goodbye note. I want to have date stamped proof that we love her because I worry about the things her parents will tell her about us. I worry that she'll think we didn't love her. I worry that she will grow up hating us. I worry too much...

Dear Mary,

Since your parents are not allowing me to see you or speak to you one last time, I want to write you a goodbye note. I know they would never show it to you so I won't send it to you. I write it here in hopes that someday I can show it to you. That someday (soon?) our paths will cross again and in a positive way...

I want you to know that we love you. Your grandparents fought hard to gain visitation rights when your parents did not want you to see them anymore. They won but now your parents are once again taking those rights away and refusing to allow us to see you. Your grandparents love you but they know your parents will never give up. I think not fighting back this time is one of the hardest things we've had to do as a family. 

We don't want to abandon you and I hope that you don't feel abandoned. You are family. You are my niece. You are beautiful and you are special. My boys adore you, Steven follows you around like an annoying little brother. He wants to do everything you do. And I have so many sweet memories of you. I remember teaching you to use "nice hands" when you were little. I remember our trip to Colorado, me a newly wed, and you like our little daughter. We loved traveling with you, tantrums and all. I remember going to see the snow with you and a hike we recently took. You're such a trooper. I remember a million Sunday dinners and you and your choosy seating (usually by Mike & Mecca) and you and your picky appetite (and peculiar appetite-- frozen peas & frozen chicken nuggets!). I remember your instance on a "ride around the block" with Mike. I remember the contraband bubble gum I got you for your birthday and how one pack of gum made you unbelievably happy. I remember your sweet hugs and your sweet smile.

Mary you are a part of my life and I hope that this isn't the end forever. I hope you remember the love that my family has for you. I hope you can see past the things your parents tell you and hope that your new mom will take care of you. She has fought so hard to get us away from you but she can't keep you out of our thoughts and prayers. And she can never stop us from loving you.

Until we meet again.

Lots of love,

Aunt Jenny