Anger Management

Last week started off really rough. My kids were being super naughty and pushing all my buttons. It was feeling like I spent each day just yelling at them for one thing or another. On top of that Tyler had 3 finals Thursday so he was super busy leaving me alone and stretched to my limits. And then in addition to that, I had a really awful tutoring experience Tuesday night. 

This student is usually difficult, I think he has ADD, but it wasn't the lack of attention that brought me to my melt down. It was the fact that he began to argue with me (just like my kids had been doing with me all day). It all started when I told him he was writing the info in the wrong box on a chart. He then got mad and said that I wasn't filling out the chart correctly. I told him I was a teacher once and I knew how to fill it out so he retorted "Were you in the classroom with me when my teacher told me how to to do it?" Then he refused to do it because he said I kept changing things (which I hadn't). And then he got upset saying it didn't matter if he did it because I was just going to tell on him anyways. In the end, his mom arrived, he cried and then there were many apologies from mom (not him) when she learned about his behavior.

After picking up my own kids, I got home and just wanted to cry. I was tired of feeling so mad and frustrated with kids all day. I was wondering if I should stop praying for patience because all that seemed to do is give me more situations for me to lose my patience in.

Then as I was sitting on the couch feeling totally miserable I got a text message from my sweet visiting teacher saying: "This is totally random but do you need me to pick up anything for you at Walmart?" I didn't need her to but I knew it wasn't random at all, I know who was making her think of me at that time. It was confirmation of truths that I forget so easily, Heavenly Father knows me and loves me. He has a plan for me. 

And then I decided I needed some help learning patience so the next day I went out and bought a book that I've been thinking I should read for awhile now. It called Screamfree Parenting and I am so glad I got it. I don't think it has any revolutionary ideas like it states it does but it has a lot of kind of "duh!" stuff that I needed to her. And so far it has been helping to make our house more calm. Here are some of my favorite "duh!" ideas I got from it... 

-I need to calm my own anxiety over my kid's choices because they are there choices not mine and I can't force them to be good (I am responsible to them not for them)

- I need to be consistent about enforcing consequences for their bad choices and I need to pick consequences that I am willing to enforce (I need to keep my promises)

- When my child has a problem I need to say "gosh that stinks! how are you going to fix it?" instead of always fixing it for them (it's helping with Ben)

- I need to take care of myself first (sounds weird I know but it's the whole oxygen mask in crashing airplane sort of idea- put it on you before putting it on your child)

Anyways, I still have issues and I still yell every once in awhile but things are definitely better in the Hatch home :)

Complaints

I tend to be to wordy when I complain so I will make a few abbreviated complaints- and then I will try to let go and be more positive!

1) My boss is frustrating me because she's giving me grief about paying me $100/month for rent, insurance, supplies. She just wants to pay for insurance and supplies and doesn't seem to think that using my house for her tutoring company warrants rent (Rebekka also tutors out of my home). She also wants to tell me exactly what to buy with the money (like a rug & a divider for the room, neither I feel necessary).

2) I just registered Steven for full day Kindergarten next year and that makes me sad because if I am still on this tutoring schedule I will never see my Steven. But I don't want him to behind academically and he doesn't learn well from me.

3) I cut off a sliver of my thumb this week with a kitchen knife and it was hard to go through most of the week without being able to use one of my thumbs normally.

4) I wish Lucy would just nurse normally again and not constantly be screaming at me when I try to feed her. It stresses me out!

And the complaints are done so I will end with a sweet story:

We had just dropped Steven off at preschool & Ben asked me why Steven had to go to preschool. I told him he needed to go there to learn (about "Sponge Bob" right!?). Ben replied, "But he's my friend and I NEED him!" Obviously I won't be the only one missing Steven next year!

Homework

So now for the big news in the Hatch Home- I will now be tutoring out of my home.  Awhile back I had a doom & gloom discussion with my boss where she explained that she wasn't making enough money and made me feel like I was going to be fired or paid less (which though she hadn't blatantly said that, I did later find out those were the options she was considering). During that discussion I offered her my home for us to tutor out of in order to help her save money (and keep my job & my salary). And without a later discussion she decided to take me up on my offer. Rebekka & I will now be tutoring our clients out of my home instead of our office on Recker & Baseline. And Tina will be tutoring her clients out of her own home.

It makes me sad because I liked keeping work & home life separate. I also liked having a Smartboard to use, and so did my students. And it also made me major stressed... 

At first I decided that I was going to turn our front living room into our tutoring space which wouldn't have been too hard but then I realized that just wasn't going to work. Keeping the kids off the stuff would be too hard. So this week I had the fun job of turning the playroom into my tutoring office. It was a lot of work but  after staying up until midnight one night and then having my parents help out a bit the next morning, I was able to get it done! I still need to buy some things and bring over some things from the other office but the BIG work is done. So here are the results:

The boy's little table got moved to where Tyler & my desks are & where all the arts & crafts supplies are located- so now it's in a location that makes sense.

Here is the tutoring office (in what used to be the playroom):

And here is the boys new playroom. It used to be our spare/guest bedroom so what's not featured in this picture, is a bed & 2 dressers shoved up against the opposite wall...:

Anyways, I think in the long run this will be better because it will allow me some distance from my boss who I love as a person but not so much a business person. And I am loving, so far, having the playroom upstairs. It's roomier, brighter and I like having that there are no toys downstairs. Plus the boys have been having too much fun with it. It's like all their toys are brand new just because they are in a new location :)

Work

This week Tyler had some excitement when the company next to his caught on fire. This wasn't just a little fire either, and he ended up being "forced" by firefighters to evacuate his building and go home. It was scary to get a call from him and then see the huge blaze on the news but at least it was in that order. And I am so glad the firefighters were able to contain it and no one was seriously injured by it. Here is the picture he took of Farnsworth Wholesale Company on fire.

I also had some "excitement" this week with my job. My boss (who is also the only other tutor) told me this week that she took a teaching job again. She is going to be working full time as a reading specialist this coming school year but she wants to keep her tutoring company. That means that I will get a lot of her clients so I probably won't have to sub anymore. Yeah! So glad because subbing was not going to work well when I have a nursing baby to feed (inconsistent breaks would make pumping hard). It will also be nice that my boss will finally have to let go of some control a little too, I like being independent :) This is truly perfect timing and I feel so blessed! 

A mostly me themed post

This week was ultra busy- as usual! Monday, Wednesday and Friday morning I was in charge of Steven's preschool. It went so smoothly and even though it's my last week for this school year, it won't be my last week ever. Thankfully there are enough people interested in doing it next year that Steven will get to be in preschool again. That makes me so happy because without the co-op, he wouldn't get to go to preschool at all.

Tuesday and Thursday I subbed. Tuesday's sub job was exhausting! They had Field Day which meant standing out in direct sunlight for 2 hours- no shade. And unlike the Field Days from my youth, this one included no water play. Plus they didn't have enough Otter Pops for the teachers. Absolutely depressing. But the highlight to the job: my old principal from Coronado, the one who I thought hated me, actually told me I could come see her if I ever want to teach full-time again. Very flattering!

However, that evening I got in trouble with my tutoring boss. I have this awful parent who is constantly "forgetting" to tell me that their child is not going to come to tutoring, and my boss wasn't happy with how I handled the situation. Apparently stating facts- that they are habitually not showing without a heads up so I will have to charge them the no-show fee- was not the way to do it. She also said I was being too crabby with one of my students. It's no fun to get in trouble so I must start working on my niceness. Darn pregnancy hormones.

Sadly I lost 3 tutoring sessions this week. I'm just so good that they don't need me anymore (or just so mean they don't want to see me anymore). But the one client was nice enough to get me a gift card to T.G.I.Friday's (and make me the sweetest card) so Tyler & I had a nice date night tonight. I love FREE food!

And since this post is not too fun, I will end this me-centered post with a fun picture:

Yes, Steven willingly let his daddy try out his rope tying skills on him :)

Complaints

So I need to complain a bit and then I'll move on to happy and positive posts. Life can be so frustrating so sometimes I just need a good vent.

1st: I took Ben to the ENT and of course he magically stopped drooling the day before leaving me with no evidence to show the doctor. Now I would like to be excited and say it's done but this happened before (remember when I blogged what I thought was the end of the drool?) and it was only temporary. With no evidence and no physical signs of anything wrong, the doctor's verdict is that he will out grow it (or already has). Is it bad that I really wanted something to be wrong? The amount of drool that kid produces just can't be normal.

2nd: I took Steven to the dentist. He did SO good! I was so proud of what a big boy he was being- proud to the point of near tears (yes I am becoming one of those emotional moms). Then...the dentist came to look at his teeth and it was problem central. By the end of his visit I wanted to cry for completely different reasons. His teeth are a downright mess, just like mine. A couple crowns and quite a few cavities. And teeth are so expensive to fix, especially when an anesthesiologist has to come in and to put him under (which is apparently not covered by medical or dental insurance). It'll be over $1000 to fix his teeth which is hard to swallow when you know he will eventually loose them anyways. At least we have a savings or I have no idea   what we would do about his failing teeth.

3rd: My laptop's wireless card has died. This means I am now sharing a computer with Tyler (since all I ever use is the internet anyways). And with homework to do, he gets priority. No more spending my evenings on Facebook and Pinterest. I suppose that's one way to end my addictions...

4th: My back is still giving me grief. Which stinks because I was finally enjoying running. Running was, at long last, not feeling so torturous and I finally felt like my speed was improving. Maybe the quicker speed is the culprit of the pain, though. Ugh.

5th: We moved to a new place for tutoring. At first I was excited- it's always fun to be somewhere new! But it's not so fun when the new place is much smaller and I am now less than a few feet away from my boss with little separating us as we tutor. This means me and my first grade clients have to be quiet. So hard to play fun learning games AND be quiet. Lousy.

Now I'll stop whining and post something super positive and happy that you must read so you don't get annoyed by my negativeness. Thanks for listening friends :)