Holidays

Last Saturday I took the kids to the Bass Pro Shop Winter Wonderland. I thought if we hit it before Thanksgiving, we would hit it before it got crazy. But I was severely disappointed :(. Apparently all the rain that day had driven us silly Arizonians indoors and it was super crowded.I had promised the boys a visit with Santa but there was an hour and half wait before we could stand in line and then once in line, it would be another half hour wait. I just didn't think it was going to happen seeing how I was on my own with 3 kids but I decided to play it by ear. If the kids cooperated and had fun at the store for an hour and half then we would see Santa.

Well, they did. They had fun racing remote control cars, shooting toy guys, riding the carousel, looking at all the cool camping stuff and of course, watching all the cool fishes:

So, when our turn to stand in line came, we went. And I was feeling really good! The line was moving along, there were only a handful of kids in front of us and everyone was happy- even Lucy! And then....Santa decided to take an unexpected break. You could tell it was unexpected because the Elves all looked panicked. And as we waited a long 20 minutes for him to mosey on back, Lucy began to loose it. And when he finally did come back and it was our turn to go up- boom! She broke her fancy necklace and there were beads everywhere (so depressing!). And then I attempted to get her to sit with a no speak Santa (seriously- he didn't even ask the kids what they wanted, it was so weird) she screamed out in bloody terror. So no Lucy in this picture but at least I got a picture of the boys with Santa (even if he was a weirdo Santa):

Also, this week was Thanksgiving! Yay for spending time with family! We enjoyed a nice morning and afternoon with my family, pigged out nice and fine on Thanksgiving food (had a smoked turkey this year and it was AMAZING!), then hung out at Tyler's house and when night time came- it was Black Friday time (well technically it's Black Thursday now). I actually got Tyler to come with me because he was in need of some winter clothing  and wanted to pick it out himself. And though he complained quite a bit, it was still fun to have him there. It was a nice, late night date night. And we scored a lot of good winter coats and sweaters!

The next day, the boys insisted on decorating the tree, I was feeling exhausted from the night before and let them have at it...

And then later after they were sleeping I got a second wind and finished decorating it and even put up a few decorations (not too much this year since we will be moving *hopefully* right after Christmas). Here is the boys with the finished tree the next morning:

Answers

So we are officially moving to Michigan. This past week I have definitely had the answer to my prayers and I have felt that peace and affirmation that we should go to Michigan, I especially felt that when we were in the temple. But when you leave the peace of the temple, it's easy to forget all that. I still have lots of emotional moments... moments of sadness, anxiety, worry. I think it's only natural when you are moving so far from home to a place that is so unlike where you have lived for the past 28 years of your life and a place that you have never even seen. But I would like to share my moments of personal revelation. Moments that I am going to need to hold on tight to when doubt creeps in.

The first night Tyler got the offer, right after I said a prayer asking if we should go, I read a conference talk by Henry Eyring called To My Grandchildren. When I read the part where Eyring spoke about how his mother moved far away from her own widowed mother so his father could support his family, I felt an overwhelming sadness and I will admit that I bawled. I think even at that moment I knew we needed to go and I knew how very much I was going to miss my mom.

Then on Saturday night Tyler & I went to the temple with a hope to find comfort and peace in our decision to move to Michigan. As we prepared to go, I was worried it would be too crowded and I really wanted to have time afterwards to talk with Tyler but the Lord blessed us and we were literally able to walk right in to do sealings. Then while doing a sealing I felt a very distinct impression that this was all I needed, my spouse, my children. It doesn't matter where we are, as long as we are together. It was an amazingly peaceful moment.

Also, throughout this process I kept remembering a talk I heard, I couldn't remember where, that had spoken about how there wasn't one right location to live, the church could use you anywhere. I couldn't remember who or any of the exact details but wouldn't you know that my good friend quoted it in a comment she made on my last blog. She wrote how the speaker said people would call the Stake President asking for advice on the safest neighborhoods, best schools and strongest wards but "not once did anyone ask where their family would be needed the most." Going to a place that won't be so filled with members was definitely a worry for me but this talk helped me realize that I need to stop being so self-focused. Who knows who we can impact there. Their will certainly be a lot more missionary opportunities in Michigan than we have here. And honestly, though I am normally terrified of speaking to others in general, I weirdly feel very excited about this...

And I will end this lengthy post by just saying that though I may not sleep well at night and my stomach may be in a constant churn, I know that's just me being me and I know that our family belongs in Michigan for the next few years, we really do. And though it won't be easy and I will probably miss AZ like crazy the Lord has a purpose for us there. If nothing more then to just make us a closer, stronger family. And despite my crazy emotions, I am excited for this adventure, I really am!

Changes & God

On Tuesday GM in Milford called and offered Tyler a job. The offer came a lot sooner than expected and now we have a big decision to make. Logically it makes sense: it is his only job offer, they had given a salary bracket and chose the higher end, they are offering him a sign on bonus (that'd be useful for buying winter clothes), he'll have a good amount of paid time off (16 holidays & 3 weeks vacation), and most importantly its his dream job! BUT we'll be 33 hours away from our families in freezing cold weather. And the LDS population will certainly not be what it is here. And there are just a lot of scary unknowns (like how unearth are we going to all of 5 of us and our van and truck and all our stuff to a place 33 hours away!?) so right now we're doing a lot of praying and pondering. On Wednesday he is flying up to Michigan so hopefully we'll either be 100% in or out by then. 

On a completely different note: The other day Benny drew a picture and said, "This is God." We weren't really sure that he was really saying God at first so we asked a couple of times for verification. Once confirmed, Steven asked, "Why is he so big?" Ben replied, "Cause he just grows big." That boy is so profound ;)

Chaos Vs Calm

It is so funny to me how life works. Last week was so completely busy with getting things ready for the garage sale, fun Halloween activities and Lucy's party and then this week happened. Albeit this week did start off slightly chaotic with taking Lucy to the Dr's, watching Tara's kids and dealing with Steven's seasonal allergenic cough that kept him up at night and kept him out of school. BUT after going to the Doctor's Wednesday and being told to get some over the counter Zyrtec, he was almost immediately better and I ended the week feeling totally relaxed and even a bit lazy--- like shouldn't I be doing something? Am I really just sitting here reading a book and not feeling an ounce of guilt? Maybe I should have another kid or something--- ha, ha OR something! And my life always seems to go like that, craziness is rarely spread around but rather jam packed into one week. So thank heavens for a relaxing end of the week!

 I am concerned that this calmness won't last long because the possibility of us moving to Michigan is getting even stronger and that will definitely jam in some more chaos. Tyler has now had 3 interviews with them and they ended by saying they will call sometime soon and schedule for us both to fly up there. Now they've said that before so I'm not counting on it yet but if that phone call happens, then a move will be inevitable- gulp! So many mixed emotions on that one. 

But lets end with happiness- here are 2 adorable pictures (Steven refused to pose for me so it's his own fault he's neglected this week ;) ):

Lucy Turns the Big 1

I am so grateful to have a beautiful, healthy little girl who (miraculously) has made it to her first birthday. My sweet Lucy has been so unlike my boys and even though that can be challenging, I love it! She was probably the worst nurser, she probably did the worst at sleeping through the night, she hates when I'm tutoring and constantly bangs on my office door, she loves to stick little tiny objects in her mouth (but will usually relinquish them when asked) and she is a monkey like no other child before her, climbing up on tables, strollers and many unsafe objects. But I love to watch her toddle around and give her dollies a good hug and sweetly put them in her new doll stroller. I love to see her wave "hello" at EVERYONE (usually once they've turned around). I love how when I take her out for walks everyone swoons over her and proclaims that she is the happiest baby alive (little do they know). I love how she cuddles with me when she first wakes up. I love how she shyly hides her face on my shoulder when a stranger says hello. And I absolutely love dressing her up on Sundays (even if dresses driver her crazy). She is my sweet, beautiful daughter and this year with her has gone much too quickly!

For her first birthday we invited all our family over for an ice cream party. Here is the cupcake ice cream cone cake I made. Not the best but it served it's purpose:

Here she is in her second birthday outfit for the day, sporting her new necklace (which she ended up just eating and then soon after tried desperately to remove):

Unlike my two cry baby boys who both wailed when sung to, there was no crying from Lucy! She looked a little bored at first but gave us a smile in the end. The boys enjoyed blowing out her candle for her.

She had no interest in eating the cupcake, even after I gave her a bite, so sadly it ended up in the trash. Poor little cupcake.

She did not care for the opening of presents, it made her fussy and cranky but she gave THE BEST reactions to her presents once they were visible. Lots of smiles and squeals and she didn't even cry when we took them away (also unlike her brothers):

For her birthday she got baby piano, a doll stroller/walker, 2 dolls, a cute little monster doll that makes adorable squeaky noises, a Cinderella board book, 2 purses, some clothes and a pair of shoes.

All in all a perfect party for my favorite daughter ;)

Hair Lost & Halloween Fun

This has been a crazy week! The first big thing to happen was I chopped over 10 inches of my hair off. It was sort of spontaneous and sort of not. I've been wanting to do it for over a month now and on Tuesday I just got brave and sent a text to a friend in my Ward who cuts hair asking if she could cut mine the next day. I sort of thought she'd say no since it was so last minute but she didn't so I was committed. She did a great job, I just wish I could style my hair as well as she did. But it's a fun change and I may get even braver and go full out pixie next time!

This week I was going to make a special Halloween dinner every night but thanks to tutoring and our Ward Party and pure craziness, I made a total of 2 Halloween themed meals instead of the planned 4. Bloody eyeballs & Ghost Pizza:

For Halloween Steven had a costume parade at school. He didn't carry his Hobbes ( he was"dressed as Calvin) so it looked like I was the lame mom who forgot to put her child in a costume. Afterwards I got to help out in his classroom and it was cute to see him doing fun Halloween things with all his friends, like pin the nose on the pumpkin and hot pumpkin. He was even a sweet boy and decorated a cupcake just for me.

That night we went trick or treating in our crazy neighborhood with all of Tyler's family. Our neighborhood was literally full to capacity with the amount of people there but they're are so many fun houses that go all out with decorations. Steven even got chickeny about going to some of them because they were" too creepy", silly boy!